scribblechic

I wish I were someone who loved Mother Nature’s artful strokes of lightning or disorienting clashes of thunder the way I wish I could swan dive into the ocean.  Instead I hide under the covers and peek at the sky with awe and terror completely humbled by the limitless authority of nature.  This morning dark clouds gathered overhead, erasing the sun from the sky.  Watching the water pour  outside my windows I wished I could wash away my fear and let the beauty bring me peace.

Today’s storm arrived shortly after I returned from driving my daughter to her last day of summer school.  Fear clouded my thoughts and I wanted to gather my daughter home; to know she was safe nearby.  Watching the mature trees in our neighborhood sway strongly against the wind I weighed the safety of my imagined rescue mission against reality.  Motherhood seems to ask us to place so much of our own happiness and fear in the hands of variables we can neither predict nor control.  Each burst of thunder seemed to mock my doubts.

The storm is waning; clouds scattering and the rhythm of raindrops tapering into a predictable percussion.  I am coming out from under the covers to marvel at the sheer brilliance of the trees no longer dangerous but rather resplendent from their shower.  Silly me, there were no monsters under the bed, only shadows.

Tagged: Fear, Storms