looking forward
January 22, 2014 § 8 Comments
In any community of thought, shared conversation or private musing, there is an invitation to wonder. Part of my exercise in embracing one word to guide the year ahead involved creating a space of meditative rumination so that my intentions might dwell in possibility. This year in an effort to exercise a greater self-awareness and consistency of intention I am using Ali Edward’s One Little Word program to guide me in monthly reflections.
Humbly and with an honesty born of a most intimate uncertainty I am sharing an unexpected fear. One line, an unpretentious prompt, has undermined my enthusiasm and sent me scuttering under the bed, flashlight in tow; not quite ready to own my fear but desperate to name that which I cannot hide from.
What am I most excited about in 2014?
The year ahead holds so many fears and worries. I have dressed my doubts in hope and paraded them through potential certainties, but I have not yet written on my calendar a place for anticipation; a day or activity that I might dress in excitement. Instead I have looked to the present and postponed my plans while shuffling maybes into predictions. Today I am looking forward, past uncertainties, that I might create reasons to invite Joy into the future.
scribblechic 
I trust you’ll tell us what you find!
Of course!
As JM said, I am looking forward to hearing what plans bring you joy–a joy that pierces any fear or worry.
Your turn of phrase ” a joy that pierces any fear or worry” weighed heavy in my thoughts all evening. I am hesitant to respond as the journey toward discovery feels greater than the expectation of finding and thus knowing.
For now I am considering a calendar day that marks time together with my family; a moment to look forward to and later to recall. Inviting and creating, gifting and claiming joy.
“…a day or activity that I might dress in excitement.”
Maybe this is the affliction of parenthood. The excitement becomes external, experienced through our children. If we’re not careful, we lose the ability to feel it from the inside. Thank you for this reminder. I hope we all find ways to rediscover that joy.
“The excitement becomes external, experienced through our children.” From the moment I first knew my children, even before the weight of their form in my arms could create a space in my memory, I drew from their presence a joy previously unmatched.
Thank you for this lovely, well-articulted truth.
Love that word: “anticipation.” Also the title of one of my favourite songs. Yes, as Carly Simon says, “These are the good old days.”
They are, indeed, good days.