a year ago, today
January 21, 2016 § 11 Comments
A close friend called at an unexpected hour with an unfamiliar sadness in her voice.
Can you come over?
It should be said this friend was new to my life, old to my soul; one of those rare individuals placed in my path by a purpose greater than our excuses to spend time together.
On this day, she was facing the early hours of a new loss and I was offered, generously, the opportunity to be present in her grief.
I remember admiring her raw vulnerability, the beauty in the honesty of her emotions. Tears like a blessing.
Reaching out and letting go.
It is the only memory I have to offer, the only way I know to mark this day.
So, I remember my friend’s grief and her love; they are inseparable. Joy is not the exclusion of loss.
I carry this lesson in my bones to live more consciously.
My friend did not pretend away her pain, she gave me permission to stand witness to her emotions.
Acting brave and feigning strength is an exhausting act; one that depletes the very marrow of our integrity with illusions of honesty. It is a facade that hides our fragility, something too often presumed a weakness.
Our relationships, family and friendship, are stronger for the tender faults that crack our hearts open further with love.
scribblechic 
Beautiful writing 🙂
Thank you. I credit the beauty to my friend and her luminous spirit.
The more years I live, the more I realize the only friends worth having are those that are old to our souls. So glad you could be there for her.
And I’m just so very glad she asked.
Only in love and friendship do we truly open ourselves up to each other, providing honest glimpses of emotion. Beautifully expressed.
I had a beautiful conversation with my daughter the other day about trust and friendship; we were trying to decide which one comes first. They are so inseparable in our experiences of love.
It is a very beautiful thing to hold a hand out in friendship at such a time in another’s life.
That is the meaning of love, our ability to give at such a time, the empathy to connect with and support by sharing in their grief.
And within that, it even teaches us about ourselves.
A lovely post Marie, thank you.
I answered a call and that’s important; we need to show up in our lives and the lives of those we love.
But.
This day for me has to be about my friend and the lesson I’ve been carrying around in my heart for a year. Today is about what my friend offered me.
Then it is a gift indeed Marie.
Just the other day one of my students confided in me. It was difficult for her and I did my very best to use my ears more than my mouth. We talked and in the end she said, ‘Thank you.” To which I replied, without any emphasis, “Thank you.” She looked at me quizzically, “did you just say, Thank You?” I just smiled.
I know you get it.
I do, Maurice. It is such an privilege to listen.