scribblechic

Parenting magazines and childhood development books enumerate eloquently on the psychological and emotional benefits of play. Parents facilitate play dispensing it with the regularity of an essential vitamin, using play as a directive and alternately assigning it time slots in busier schedules. At twelve years old my son plays in a manner not unlike the parallel play common to young children, beside another rather than interacting directly with another. Play when left to his own endeavors is independent, when directed by us it becomes an exercise in navigating the social challenges of communicating with another.

Social practice sessions in formal groups often place my son in a circle of chairs using a partially scripted conversation. I tend to identify these as warm up routines, similar to the mundane act of playing catch in preparation for the big game. My son goes through the motions waiting to be called to the plate. When he doesn’t get invited to play, he retreats into individual interests.

Last night I watched my son exercise his social knowledge in a setting intended to be recreational. He was working at playing. I enrolled my son in a rock climbing class, aware this was an individual activity that highlighted a natural skill set, hoping perhaps he would meet another child that shared his interest. I was aligning chance in hopes of fostering a conversation and play.

On the first day of class I was pleasantly surprised to note that the only other child in his time slot was a familiar face from our past, a young girl also on the Autism Spectrum who we met in a structured social group a couple of years back. I recognized the mother from waiting room conversations and inwardly applauded our good fortune. Two children in need of practical exercises in play, sharing an interest and need, working through play.

Last night I watched my son and his peer guide one another up a rock wall, blindfolded, directing one another and encouraging one another over obstacles toward a goal. There could be no greater moment that witnessing this sharing. I fell asleep last night peaceful with the knowledge that this new experience with an old acquaintance is providing an essential, natural opportunity for my son to play.

Tagged: Autism Spectrum, Musings, Play, Son