self made
December 18, 2015 § 4 Comments
It began with a classroom assignment, a Social Studies lesson asking children to create a model example of ancient technology. Our daughter was cavalier in her efforts right up to the day she appeared with a colorful stack of construction paper piled onto her bed. In a single evening she cut and folded unlikely material into the shape of her assignment.
There was a moment when I first saw her bent over the stack of paper, that I was tempted to entertain a trip to a craft store for materials that might be more pliable and polished. Instead I watched as one-dimensional pieces of paper began to evolve into wheels with intricate spokes, suffocated in layers of scotch tape.
I cannot remember an assignment in our old community where children weren’t required to purchase materials for projects or when parents didn’t fashion their handiwork into their child’s task. I worried that our daughter’s efforts would appear laughable next to more elegant models, but I couldn’t bring myself to undermine her independence.
It was a happy surprise, when my husband and I attended her class museum, to see similarly fashioned models. Construction paper artifacts and Lego creations, repurposed toys and hand drawn examples. It is a standard of excellence that speaks to effort and attention over end results.
Today our daughter will present another project, this time for Science. When asked to create a solution to a problem, our daughter started engineering something I didn’t understand. There was a temptation to ask questions or offer help; an instinct to guide under the guise of support. Then, I read a quote tagged to a message from her Science teacher.
“Too often we give children answers to remember rather than problems to solve.” Roger Lewin
So I created space, offering our daughter room to struggle a bit against her assignment. There were times she came to me worried she might be wrong and we looked together for what those doubts might mean. I challenged our daughter to honor her big idea and I trusted her teacher to recognize the value in each mistake.
Last night our daughter asked that she go it alone today; that her father and I sit out her presentation. Gone are the days of elementary parties and hands-on help, our youngest is coming into her own; standing proudly independent at the culmination of her work.
scribblechic 
It’s so hard to let go. You nailed it, though.
I keep reminding myself that it is as it should be, then fill my hands, time, and thoughts with activities that fulfill my sense of self.
It must be said that I was just thinking of you today, an old holiday post of yours; your comment was perfectly timed with my thoughts. Nice to “see” you, again.
Better learning happens that way. Sure, the end result is never as good but that’s never the point. She gains experience, skill and confidence this way.
…and you get to feel pride 🙂
It’s the way it should be, a brave and curious wondering that demands mistakes in trade for knowledge.